


I give up

by Vale_soft



Category: Cravity (Band)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Boyfriends, Boys In Love, Crying, Falling In Love, First Love, Kiss Kiss Fall in Love, Kissing, M/M, Relationship(s), Romance, Sad Ending, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-11 23:27:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28625679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vale_soft/pseuds/Vale_soft
Summary: ❛ If we can't be together, we lost, it means we give up! ❜
Relationships: Ahn Seongmin/Song Hyeongjun
Comments: 4
Kudos: 6





	I give up

Seongmin thought it would just be laughter and smiles while he was with Hyeongjun. That they would be like those typical couples who would live happily ever after. What a shit they told him.

Sadly that was not how things would end. And they would be from another reality as he would live them being with Hyeongjun. Because he knew their relationship was going down a bottomless pit.

Why? For the simple fact that Hyeongjun no longer likes him. And how did he find out? Well, the older one no longer interacted much with him, they didn't sleep in the same room even though they shared the same house. They spoke little, they could barely exchange a few words. They no longer went on dates or cared. All that was lost with the passage of time. And Hyeongjun knew it.

The older one realized that he no longer had feelings for the younger. He did not know if it was due to the lack of attention between them because he went to work all day and the child studied, or it was that he did not really love him as he believed. Because in himself, he tried to think that it was only temporary and that they would do the couple from before. But he realized that the problem was not that, but him.

Seongmin knew that Hyeongjun no longer had that " _infatuation_ " effect towards him. Like that teenage love like they were before. He believed that this problem would go away, because he loved Hyeongjun so much that he was afraid of losing him. He wouldn't know what to do without it. He thinks of all the little problems they may have had, but that didn't stop them from reconciling. Well, this problem they had now, would not be something temporary.

Seongmin cried at night after knowing that Hyeongjun no longer cared about him like he used to before, knowing that he felt uncomfortable when he kissed him, knowing that he would say a pretext to get away from him when Seongmin invited him to something. He didn't think all that pain was going to leave them with nothing.

"So you think Hyeongjun should cooperate too?"

"Of course hyung. So we can both maintain our relationship as before"

"You are desperate. That's what happens to you"

"I'm not Serim hyung. I'm fine. I'm just saying it so we can be happy again"

"And force Hyeongjun to do the part of him? Don't you think that something insistent is?"

"It'll work hyung" Seongmin said with a smile.

"I think so" he thought in his mind.

"What do you want me to cooperate with?"

Seongmin nodded.

"Maybe we can fix this"

Perhaps for Hyeongjun it was okay to cooperate. Perhaps he would feel that feeling of love towards Seongmin as before if he cooperated in their relationship and would remove his doubts in him.

And that's how the two of them kept trying for several months. Seongmin believed that everything was fine with the two of them. They returned to give that effect of affection to both that he so much wanted to feel again. But for Hyeongjun, everything went from bad to worse. He didn't mind being with the minor. It's just that he no longer enjoyed the same things with him. He pretended to smile at him, pretended to feel things for him, pretended to be okay with him.

"Do you want to sleep with me this time?" Seongmin said in a seductive voice, as he gently touched Hyeongjun's shoulders.

"I'm just going because I'm feeling tired, okay?" He got up from the couch to go into his room.

Seongmin just sighed and followed in the footsteps of the older of him. When he had already laid down on the bed, he wanted to snuggle into Hyeongjun's chest. But the older man pushed him away to turn his back on him. Seongmin also turned around holding the sobs in his throat, only letting a few tears escape from his sad eyes.

Now he knew that the oldest would only be with him by commitment. That all his efforts had been in vain. That all they did in these months was make things worse. Maybe he should just stop trying and let this all be over. But Seongmin didn't want to give up. He had a small hope that he would have a chance with Hyeongjun. Hope is the last thing you lose.

"You should stop trying"

"No hyung, I'm sure we both still have that spark between us"

Serim rolled his eyes. He knew that the youngest of him were so dreamy since he met him.

He remembers how Seongmin had told him the story of how he met Hyeongjun. When he first saw him in a stadium that was in the same school as his, he had fallen in love with him at first sight. Seongmin just thought that it would be something that he would take away from his as time went by. But it was not like that, because when his hands were sweating it was not because of the heat, but because of the nervousness when he saw or was close to Hyeongjun. That when he felt that pain in his stomach it was butterflies every time he thought of Hyeongjun. And that when his heart was beating faster than normal, it wasn't because he was sick. It was because he had already completely fallen in love with Hyeongjun.

He tried fully to get close to the older one, but froze every time he went to say a word to him. Every time he had a chance he wasted it. So one day he steeled himself and told Hyeongjun about his feelings. And surprisingly, luckily for him, Hyeongjun also felt the same way as him. Only he didn't know how to come forward to his youngest. And from that day they started dating, people said they were one of the best couples they had ever known. But now, now those were just things that could be forgotten.

"If you don't stop this, you might regret it"

"I know, I know. You know that I will never give up"

"I hope so. Then don't say that I'm always right"

And of course he did.

Seongmin might never be able to give up. But he had the option to do it. Now he felt that in some way or another he was forcing Hyeongjun to be with him instead of making his own life from now on. He imagined that Hyeongjun would be angry with him, only that he was hiding it from him after thinking about fixing the situation from him.

"Hyung, are you mad at me?" Seongmin asked suddenly.

Hyeongjun stopped paying attention to his book to focus his gaze on Seongmin "Why you believe that?

"I don't know. I just guessed" He shrugged.

Hyeongjun put the book aside to extend his arms to him. Making Seongmin understand that he was snuggling into his chest. Seongmin thought that he was only doing it out of commitment, but actually Hyeongjun was worried about him. Had Seongmin seriously thought what would be mad at him? He wasn't, just that he no longer felt love for him. He kissed the top of the child's head while his hands caressed the younger's back.

"Hyung, do you think I look good with this red or white shirt?" Seongmin showed the two garments to the older of him.

"I think the white one would look better on you" Hyeongjun said, seeing the smile of his youngest on his lips.

They were going to have a little date for their anniversary as a couple. They would go eat and then have a good time at an amusement park. Seongmin was happy to be able to take things up again with Hyeongjun. They hung out constantly, they no longer cared about the old things and had sincere smiles between the two of them. Or at least that's what Seongmin wanted to think.

"So you think everything is fine between you and Hyeongjun?"

"Yeah, and I'm happy about that" Seongmin made half moons out of his eyes as he smiled.

"I hope everything is fine between you now" I'd be upset if something happened.

"I hope so. Everything has been going well for a few weeks"

"Well then; may the two of you live happily together"

And when it was night, Seongmin came back to his house to lie in bed with Hyeongjun. He thought the older would turn his back on him like every night, but instead, this time it was different. The older one stood behind him stroking his waist with his thumb. He made a hidden smile as he enjoyed the touch.

愛 、

Seongmin groaned when Hyeongjun had touched his sweet spot.

The older one slowly got out of him to quickly dress and leave the room. He didn't even bother to say goodbye or tell his where he was going. Seongmin only sighed to put on his clothes and go outside to get some fresh air.

He went through some streets until he was almost close to reaching a cafeteria. And it was there that a familiar figure became known to him. He saw Hyeongjun come out of a store holding someone else's hand, while he happily kissed his on the lips.

Seongmin watched in horror at the scene, leaving the place until he reached his house and quickly entered his room. That day he cried all night until he fell asleep. He didn't face Hyeongjun for three days. But the older one asked about his emotional state and told him that nothing was wrong with him. And he had gone to Serim's house so that the elder could lend him his shoulder to cry on.

That was when he made the decision to end all of this. However, he had thought about why Hyeongjun hadn't told him earlier. Thus they could have avoided more suffering for both of them. He gave himself the illusion that everything was over and that they could be happy again. Did that mean that Hyeongjun was still pretending? What was everything he had a lie about? Why hadn't he told his that he had been unfaithful to his with someone else? It would have been that way from the beginning. Now it hurt him more to know that Hyeongjun was happy with someone else to see than with him. It's not that he would like to interfere in their relationship, it's just that he was annoyed that Hyeongjun had lied to his the whole time that he had kept a secret relationship even though he was in his.

He felt discarded.

And plucking up his courage he summoned Hyeongjun to go tell him what he had thought to end it all. Quoting him in the favorite place that was for both of them. Under a tree near a park where his initials were enclosed in a heart with the typical phrase of " _Together Forever_ " He watched as Hyeongjun arrived at the park and approached him at a slow pace. Until being in front looking him in the eyes. The cold lay in the place it was preferable to stay at home with the heating on. But there they were the two of them standing in a tree that had few leaves on its branches.

"You wanted to ... gather us here" Hyeongjun began.

"Yes ..." he looked down sadly "I…" he sighed, feeling his pulse go faster through nerves "We better get on with our lives without each other"

And after saying this they were silent for a few minutes. Until the older one broke the silence.

"Are you sure?"

"I am. I know you have someone who makes you happy. And I'm glad that happened” Seongmin looked at Hyeongjun's surprised face after saying that "I hope you're fine without me, although I think I shouldn't even say it. Just…” Seongmin swallowed the lump in his throat, fighting back the urge to cry "I hope that you will be happy. I've given up, you've won the game"

The youngest looked up to still see a surprised Hyeongjun.

"You'll be fine? I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier. I'm sorry"

"You do not have to apologize. I know you, and I know you have a hard time saying things. So when you confessed to me that you liked me and you didn't know how to tell me” he recalled, laughing sadly.

"Do you still remember?" Hyeongjun made a small smile without realizing it.

"Yeah" he laughed again "Be happy who you want to be with, okay? Promise me that.

"Of course I will. I thought you were never going to say it" Hyeongjun looked away.

"I had a hard time accepting it, but in the end I did"

"I know you were trying to improve this, and I know you also realized that it wasn't going to work since we started with this problem But I'm glad we could talk about it in such a formal way"

Seongmin sighed "That's right" that's when an idea crossed his mind. Although he thought it would be a bad idea "Can we say one last goodbye? Can you ... can you give me one last kiss goodbye?" He whispered thinking that the older one hadn't heard him.

But he did hear it.

Hyeongjun slowly approached him to cup his cheeks and make him lift his face to look into his eyes. And slowly he brought his faces closer until their lips met. Seongmin felt how he let the tears escape from his eyes to support himself with his hands on the shoulders of the older man, reciprocating the kiss.

They didn't realize how many seconds they stayed like that, but they parted ways as snow began to fall from the sky. They looked up at how small snowflakes fell and then looked at each other and gave a slight smile.

"See you" Hyeongjun said goodbye, wiping Seongmin's cheeks with his fingers.

The boy watched as Hyeongjun walked away until he no longer saw him. He now he would never see him again after they are no longer together. He went around the tree where he was still standing, and saw that he was still following that heart by enclosing the letters "H" and "S" next to the phrase below them. He touched the hard wood with his hands and remembered when he and Hyeongjun did that.

He put on a wistful smile as he left the park. Him remembering all the moments that he spent with Hyeongjun from the first moment he met him. In truth he believed that he would stay with him, that all those happy endings things were real when in reality they were just stories told to children. Perhaps this is all over, he would no longer feel pain. He now he could live his life in a quiet way.

Four years were not in vain for him, they were the best moments of his life. And if he had made the choice to surrender, because he was ready to _move on._

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, I hope you like the story.  
> I love the shipp between Hyeongjun and Seongmin, so that's why I made this story ^^ 
> 
> Sad, I know. but that's what I came up with first: c


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